


Pointless' Oneshots

by thecelestialangel



Series: Useless and Plotless [2]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Character Death, Disbelief Papyrus, Drabbles, Fluff, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Major Character Injury, Memory Loss, Narrator Chara, Other, POV Alphys, Papyrus Knows More Than He Lets On, Post-Undertale Neutral Route - King Papyrus Ending, References to Undertale Genocide Route, Suicidal Thoughts, Touch-Starved, oneshots
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-03
Updated: 2018-02-04
Packaged: 2018-10-27 04:13:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,141
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10801464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thecelestialangel/pseuds/thecelestialangel
Summary: Oneshots or drabbles from UNDERTALE!Requests are OPEN!





	1. RULES

I am taking requests! 

The only rules are:

No NSFW  
No pedophilia  
No incest  
I can take the request in any chapter

 

Other than that, request away!


	2. Small Drabble Things

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unused ideas

The day was beautiful outside.  
Frisk tried very hard to enjoy it, but their thoughts wouldn't let them. They mulled over fuzzy memories, memories that didn't make any sense. They weren't even sure the thoughts were real, yet unsure if they were figments of their imagination.  
The outdoors always did this to them. Gave them thoughts. They were fairly young, yet they had already freed many beings from their suffering. They prided themselves over this achievement.  
And yet.  
They had done this a few times before. That much was certain. Of course, This was only the second time they arrived on the surface. They had played this game many times before.  
The first "run" ,as they liked to call it, was not a bad one. Not a good one either if they really thought about it. They had killed some monsters, in self defense and fear but that was all. They had felt numb at that point. Still, they made friends.  
In The second run they killed more monsters, even if that run was intended to be better. Heck, the only reason they reset was for them to be a better person. That had not been the case. They had desperately wanted to erase their sins, but they told themselves to go through the guilt. Killing was no innocent matter, and they should have been judged.  
Of course, they were still let off the hook more or less. Their guilt weighed heavy, but they continued to stay determined.  
The third run was when everyone got to the surface for the first time. It was fun, but something happened between that time and Frisk's present.  
The world had reset, that much they were aware of.  
Everything else was a mystery to them. Their mind kept trying to remember waist they did, but to no avail. There was only fuzz.

\--------------

He wasn't determined per say, but he sure as hell felt that he had to stop this human. There was a cold rage that he had only felt once before, and even then it was a clouded memory. (Song change) Something that had happened a in the past, something that was important, yet forgotten. That being said, the past wasn't relevant at this moment. There was a human in front of him. They were both currently near the core. He had initiated a fight, an ACT he had practiced with Undyne. Although she wouldn't admit it to him, she thought he was weak. She herself (Song Change) probably wasn't aware of that she looked down on him. He couldn't blame her, but his hopes went at stake when she did that to him. Nonetheless, he was thankful she taught him at least a little bit about fighting. Sans wouldn't have (Song change) taught him anything at this age, mostly because he was slightly weaker than Papyrus. Papyrus internally cringed at his insult to Sans. Well it wasn't really an insult, but Papyrus felt bad anyways. He tried hard not to get any angrier (at what he didn't know) but the thought of his fragile brother made him scowl. A face that made the awkwardly waiting human startle. He finally sent out an attack, and the look on the humans face almost made him stop. He didn't want to feel any sympathy for this human. And yet, his stupid, naive soul wanted desperately to reach out. (Song change) He wanted to do the right thing. And despite his soul screaming at him, he knew his moral selfishness would do no good for his whole race. Forgiving as he may be, even he had his limits.


	3. Ehhhhhhhh (King Papya)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> King Papyrus Ending 
> 
> I was pretty lazy with this, but it's not horrible horrible so :/

You were not the most ideal monster to sit at the throne, and you knew this. Sure, others would come in, praise you for being sweet and caring, but that was out of pity. You could see their half smiles, their lies they handed to you. Despite knowing this, you took the bait like it was a piece of candy, squealing and hugging, telling your thanks. None of the other monsters could take a negative attitude, after all. Not after all the distress they had been through in the previous months.

You focused on making others happy. You had done this even before you were king, when nobody really knew you. They heard of you, of course, the wacky skeleton with his lazy brother. Monsters didn't gossip often, but when they did, they cared not to keep it secret. Your brother pretended not to notice, you even more so. Despite that, you could've been called an acquaintance at most. You told yourself you didn't mind. 

When the human came along, you tried to "capture" them. The truth was, you were playing them. You tried to see how they were, if they were good or bad. There was always a brief moment of deja vu with them (at least, that's what you think the feeling was called), but the moment would always pass. They didn't seem to have any fun in what they were doing. You tried so hard to make them smile, but even your easy going brother seemed to be put off at their blank face. You swore the white powder on them wasn't dust. It was coated in their hair, their sweater. How naive were you too have not noticed?

(The thing is, you did notice.)

So you confronted them on their weird behavior. The shambling, the dust. You suppose it wasn't the brightest thing you could have done, but you couldn't have just let them walk away, could you?

You confronted them, and you were suddenly aware of how scary they looked, like one of the horror movies Mettaton made. Except. This was worse. 

You tried your best to give a speech that would get them to stop. You knew they could be better, you had this...feeling inside of you. You could see them as a friend. You knew they could be a friend.  
When they spared you, it was a relief. You had been genuinely proud of them, because although you were tough, you suspected two hits in would've hurt you. 

Or worse.

Looking back on your actions now, you weren't sure if you made the best decision. Scratch that, you were morally sure you made the right decision. But, as your old man used to say, the moral decision was not always the best.

Monsters were dead, and some hope was destroyed. You thanked to whatever beings above that your brother didn't drop a health point, but that didn't stop you from pitying the ones that did. 

Maybe, you thought, you should call your friend about that. You knew she wasn't there, but she had to know.

How laughable.


	4. Not Exactly Sure (Part 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not sure what this is tbh? I wrote the part with Papyrus on a seperate day, and the idea just kinda??? Went by itself. It's short, because I don't have patience.

The class had started normally enough. The professor went over all of the subjects that had been taught throughout the whole school year, most listening to their quiet, melodic voice. These monsters seemed to literally lean out of their desks, taking notes and staring intently. A few chatterted, joking that the voice was soft enough to fall asleep to. Then there were middlemen,  like Sans, who seemed to be listening. In reality, the middlemen were drifting off, not listening or talking. Sans hadn't studied, nor intended on studying. Of course, it wasn't that  he already knew most of what was being taught ('a hat to his father' most said). He just found it harder and harder to just concentrate. 

He stared off into space, until the the starchy white packet being handed out caught his attention. When it was handed to him, he stared for a few seconds before sighing.  He rested his chin on his small palm. Well that was a problem. He had wanted to actually sleep for once. He continued to stare, before eventually deciding to open the booklet. His tired eye sockets absored in the information, and he eventually picked up his pencil. Fifteen minutes had already passed. Just staring. Yeesh.  
  
The large room was almost silent, except for thr scribbling of pencils. Just as Sans was reading the directions-  
  
And he woke up.  
  
What the hell.  
  
There was a brush against his skull, and wow his eyes could barely see. He had a headache, and his legs ached.  
  
What. WHAT.  
  
Hadn't he just been...doing something? He was lying down, and his semiconcius state was full of confusion. He was in a bed. What?  
  
Then all of his senses came back. His brother was brushing at his skull with his hand and when Sans looked, he got a faceful of worry.  
  
"heya...paps..". He tried to move but ow ow ow ow ow ow. There was a pain in his chest. Upon looking down, he saw....holy crap his bones were fractured.  
Great. His ribs were broken.  
  
He decided to stay down.  
  
"W't happene'..." he mutterted, rubbing at his right eyesocket.  
Papyrus was silent, before responding quietly (Quiet? Since when was Papyrus quiet?)  
  
"I...don't know...I mean-", he looked at Sans anxiously, twindling his gloved fingers, "-not that I haven't been trying to figure it out, I have, but....I found you. In Hotland, I mean. Passed out, a.....big crack on your skull." Looking closer, Sans realized his brother looked close to tears. He stayed silent.  
  
"And....I panicked. I healed you to the best of my ability, but...you needed to be...awake to eat food."  
Sans nodded, before motioning his brother to come over.  
Papyrus walked over. Sans motioned to come closer. When Papyrus was practically leaning down, Sans brought his small arms aroung his brother's neck.  
"thank you", he croaked out.  
Papyrus started to bawl.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know this is pretty confusing??? But the next chapter will (probably) explain eveything. Or at leat Part 2 will.


	5. Freezing Your Face Off (REQUEST)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're cold.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't been active (in the writing sense) so!!! Here's a request!!! They're all OOC, but in my defense, I haven't written them much
> 
>  StormBerryMC: Frisk getting REALLY cold in Snowdin (Perhaps with Frisk/Sans/Papyrus fluff)
> 
> Warnings: The small child is slightly touch starved. Not noticeably, but it's...it's there. Attempted and failed fluff, I have no idea what affection actually is. Internal shaming (nothing major)

You touch your cold nose.

The cold temperature your body doesn't go with your warmish hands, but it feels good anyways. Pulling your blanket tighter, you shiver slightly.

 _'This is nice'_ you think.

The house you're huddled in can only be described as cozy, even with cold air occasionally sweeping from under the door. You sigh, rubbing the soft blanket against your slightly flushed cheek. It's a checkered pattern, black and white squares making their way across your shoulders. A race line pattern if you were to guess.

You're sitting on a green couch, material made of cool leather that initially had you cringe. After a few minutes, however, the cloth warmed. The stiffness had melted, as well as your icy mental state.

You recall the last few hours with another sigh, sinking further into the warmth.

Papyrus had brought you in here, talking to you as if you weren't almost freezing to death out and about. (You didn't notice the slight nudges and side glances he gave you. Hell, you barely noticed he was leading you to a cottage-like structure, at that. All you could feel was the numb pain through your fingers, and the pounding headache.)

He had walked more briskly than necessary, though. Your short legs could barely keep up with his long strides. He was practically pushing you from behind.

He also kept fidling with his gloves when he thought you didn't notice. His smile was unsure.

You hadn't know what to think of that.

He had gently nudged you inside when the door opened, immediately bounding upstairs. Before you could process that he left, he stood front of you. There was a slight tickling and you realized he had draped a blanket over you. Warmth your body and you realize that he knew.

He didn't have skin, so you questioned _how does he know your skin feels like ice?_

"I'M GOING TO MAKE A HOT BEVERAGE!! COFFEE OR TEA?" Papyrus had questioned, gently pushing a few strands of hair out of your face.

'Coffee' you mumbled, and Papyrus zoomed into the kitchen with grace.

Your bleary mind hadn't registered that this was Papyrus' house until he came back with cheerful smiles and a chipper attitude. You face was scrunched in confusion, mind less hazy.

 _'why?'_ you had asked when he'd been setting down your coffee on a small, wooden table. You had already sat yourself down, shoulders scrunched up.

He paused, before turning to you with a neutral grin. "BECAUSE YOU ASKED FOR COFFEE!!" Before you could say anything, there was a loud ZIP, a bang, and he was gone. Blinking in confusion, you questioned why he left so quickly.

(Not the nature of how he left, because of course someone zooming out of a house was normal. Of course.)

You had paused and shaken your head. 

Maybe you should've been more clear in your question.

You had grabbed the coffee gingerly, taken a sip, and sighed. The flavor was sweet, but you could still taste some bitterness on your tongue. It was practically perfect.

The coffee had quickly warmed you up, and made you tired. Which led you to sleeping soundly. Which brought you to your current situation.

You had woken up, and found, somehow, you were still cold. Not as cold as before, since there wasn't any sheen of ice on your skin, but still. So you tried to huddle up and gather warmth.

Hence, you rubbed your cold arms with hot hands. You hudde up once more, now, in the present. (You should really stop daydreaming. It's not healthy to lose place of your surroundings. Especially since you're in a stranger house.

'Not complete strangers' you defend.

Whatever helps you sleep.)

You try to drink more of your coffee to ground yourself. Getting lost in memories, no matter how close, would get you nowhere.

You nearly spill it when there's a small hand on your head. Looking up quickly, you see a large smile and tired eyes.

Sans.

You tilt your head at him, as if asking ' What are you doing?' He shrugs, feeling your forehead. He seems nonchalant, as if this is something he's required to do. A duty.

For the millionth time since you fell down, you're not sure how to feel.

"You're looking conflicted." he murmers out, almost amused. He moves his hand from your forehead, looking satisfied. You think he's going to drop his hand, but he only moves it to the top of your head. He idly strokes your hair, before looking at you.

You realize he's studying you for discomfort.

It feels strange, in a nice way. You didn't see Sans as the type to care about anything other than himself. (And maybe Papyrus, but they were related.)

You lean into his touch, and his expression doesn't change. He continues to stroke your hair.

You're not sure why you're letting him pet your hair, but it feels nice and warm. How can a skeleton feel nice and warm?

"Magic." Sans says, and you nearly have a heart attack. "It's a gift. My bro isn't here, so I'm your best heater for right now." He winks at you, and you're not sure why. You think he's just messing with you. "Feel warm?" he asks, and you realize-oh. You do feel a bit warmer.

You nod. He looks ready to say a witty quip, there's loud BANG, and Papyrus is right next to his brother.

"SANS!! YOU WARMED THEM LIKE I ASK YOU TOO!!!!!???!!!" (How do you hear the exclamation points?) Sans nods, stepping away from you. You're disappointed from the lack of contact, but you're not going to tell him that. It would be weird.

However, there's a much larger hand on your head suddenly, with a much greater warmth. Papyrus brushes your hair with his fingers for a few moments, but pulls back.

"THANK YOU SANS!! YOU DID SURPRISINGLY WELL!!" Papyrus looks satisfied, despite his poor choice of words. Sans doesn't seem to mind, if his shrug seems to indicate.

"Thanks. You convinced me to put some backbone into it." There's a slight twinkle in his eye as he winks. Papyrus groans out loudly, exagerrated.

"I JUST USED THAT TODAY!! FIND SOME BETTER MATERIAL!!!!"

"Eh."

Papyrus turns to you, a cross look on his face.

"THIS IS WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH!! EVERY!! FREAKING!! DAY!! CAN YOU BELEIVE IT?" You don't know if the question is rhetorical or not, but you nod sympathetically. Sans jokes are funny, but you don't like them. Papyrus seems to agree.

"BUT!!!-" he points at you, standing in a very cool superhero pose. "-ARE YOU OKAY!? I COMPLETELY DISREGARDED YOUR FEELINGS ON A SIGNIFICANT ISSUE!! YOU HEALTH!! I MEAN-" he cuts himself off, looking away from you. He crosses his arms in thought.

"He wants to know if it's okay that he took care of you." Sans supplies, and Papyrus snaps his fingers. He points at Sans.

"THAT'S EXACTLY IT!! GRANTED, IT COULD'VE BEEN WORDED BETTER, BUT IT'S SHORTNESS CAME ACROSS AS BLUNT AND EFFICIENT."

Papyrus swoops Sans in a quick sidehug, before looking at you again.

"SO!!!!" his shoulders hunch a bit, and he starts fiddling with his gloves. (Again) "IS IT OKAY?" You think you see sweat on his face.

Maybe you should say no, since this situation was kinda weird. But. Two skeleton take care of a nearly frozen child. There's no punchline.

It feels....nice, surprisingly. Maybe you should feel more weird about this, but you don't. You nod. Papyrus' frame loosens, and he gives you a toothy grin. Not that he can give you anything else but a toothy grin, but it makes your lips twitch. He puts his hands on his hips, and looks around. He spots the coffee mug on the table, liquid colder than it should've been.

"WELL, NOW THAT IT'S SETTLED, DO YOU WANT HOTTER COFFEE? THE CHILL SEEMS TO HAVE CAUGHT ONTO THAT MUG." His grins drops slightly, before he exclaims, "OH!! YOU MUST STILL BE COLD! SANS, WARM THEM UP MORE, I'LL GET THEM THE BEST DRINK."

He zooms to the kitchen. Sans, who had been quietly watching everything, slid a hand onto your head.

The warmth continues again, and you sigh into the checkered blanket. Granted, you were doing okay, but the extra warmth felt nice. (And maybe the attention was nice, too.)

Sans hums, petting your hair. The warmth grows, and you feel like your body is defrosting despite it not being cold.

'How does this work?' you ask, and Sans tilts his head slightly. 'The warmth.' you indicate to his hand.

"Magic." he says again, and you furrow your brow at him. He huffs out a little laugh, before sitting down next to you. "Really, it's magic. Dunno the mechanics, but it's a type of heat magic." he pauses, before shrugging. "Maybe."

That didn't answer anything, but you need to know. 'How do monsters use magic?' you ask, sinking more into the couch. "Their soul. Very culmination of their being." he gestures to his chest. "It's right here, by the way. I'm sure you knew that though." He winks.

You frown. Jesus, he was narrowly avoiding your questions.

(He's answering different questions, the ones you would've asked eventually. Thinking ahead. He could answer both questions, giving a long explanation as to how soul magic work, but. He's Sans.)

You seem annoyed, and Sans sees that. He seems to grin wider. "I'm just pulling your funny bone." he says, and you groan at the wonderful joke. "But-uh-" he pauses a moment, before motioning for.you to come closer. "-c'mere." You hesitate, before scooting over to him.

"Closer." You scoot again, and you notice you're really near him.

His form is surprisingly solid, maybe squishy. You're practically leaning on him. He pets your hair, brushing away a few strands, before motioning to his chests. "Have a listen." he says.

You brighten up, and squish your head against his chests. He hides a sputter in a cough. He didn't think you would go right up against him! Maybe a hover would've been nicer?

Well, whatever. You're a kid who desperately need affection. 

At first, you hear nothing but silence. Then, a few soft thumps make their way to your ears, and you feel another twinge at your lips.

Sans has been watching you, and he explains.

"Those are pulses of magic. A few monsters have those, but not all. They keep the bones together." he knocks at his arm.

You nod thoughtfully, before motioning at him to continue to warm you up. When he does continue, you somehow feel warmth from his hand AND soul.

It's so nice, you find yourself leaning into him. Before you know it, you wrap your arms around his middle and press yourself into him. He tenses slightly, before relaxing and continuing to pet your hair. This feel great to you. Sans feels like a couch.

There's a soft clink from somewhere, but you don't acknowledge it. Before you realize it, you're asleep. When you wake up, Sans is still there. Granted, he's not projecting any magic onto you, but you're arms are still wrapped around him.

Oh.

He's asleep, so you can't really apologize for probably cramping him up. On the plus side, that was probably the best sleep you've ever had. Sans lets out a snore, and you realize you're still clinging to him. You gently remove yourself until you're away.

You stand up, and pick up the checkered blanket, wrapping it around yourself like a cocoon. It's pattern drips onto the floor, but you're mind is still sleepy. You don't pick it up.

You realize that you hadn't really been in the best mind to look around before, so you can't help but explore.

The house has a shag carpet, with purple and dark turquoise being the dominant colors to make up a pattern. There's a TV that's almost as big as the couch, standing on a tiny table. Next to the TV, near the entrace of the kitchen, are multiple socks. None of them match, you find. How completely scandalous.

You walk into the kitchen, and are surprised to see such a mess in there.

There's a coffee mix, creamer, and a mug laying there. All mixed, too, as if someone had thrown them together. (Only with the utmost passion.)

You back out slowly.

"HUMAN!!!"

You jerk your head to the stairs, just as Papyrus is jumping off them. He lands at the bottom step with no effort, turning to you. "IM GLAD TO SEE YOU'RE AWAKE! HOW DO YOU FEEL?"

You're reeling from the fact that he jumped off the stairs, but you manage a thumbs up. He crouches down to your level, patting your head. "THAT'S VERY GOOD!! YOU'RE THE ONE ALLOWED TO SLEEP." He gives a stink eye to the couch, though there's hint of fondness.

"SANS, HOWEVER, WAS NOT ALLOWED. BUT-" he turns to you again, eyes growing soft.

"HE WAS HELPING YOU! SO IT'S A PASS. THANK YOU SANS!!"

"No problem." Sans rumbles out, and you nearly jump.

Oh. Guess he wasn't as asleep as you thought. "OH!! I TRIED TO MAKE SOME COFFEE IN THE KITCHEN, BUT IT CAME OUT TO SWEET. DO YOU STIL WANT SOME?" You nod thoughtlessly. Coffee sounded good.

"I'll make it." Sans gets up, popping his bones. Papyrus makes a surprised noise, before grinning.

"THANK YOU SANS!! THIS IS THE MOST HELPFUL I'VE SEEN YOU! EVER!! TRULY, THE BEST OF FEATS." Papyrus pretends to wipe a tear from his eye. Sans shrugs, shuffling to the kitchen.

"THANK YOU!!" Papyrus calls out again, shaking his head. "WELL! SINCE YOU FEEL A BIT BETTER, DO YOU WANT TO SEE MY ROOM?" Papyrus is practically vibrating, tapping his feet and swinging his arms.

Your lips twitch, and you nod. You reach out to him, stretching your hand.

"YOU....WANT ME TO HOLD YOUR HAND?" he looks at you. You nod, but you realize that he might not want to. You guys are almost strangers.

Just as you're about to put it down and rush past him, a warmth envelopes your hand. Papyrus grins, holding your hand gently. He leads you up the stairs, and pauses in front of his room.

"THERE'S WARNING LABEL TO MY ROOM." he says, voice serious. You tense. What happened? 

"THE REASON?" He looks at you, and you see a slight twinkling in his eyes. "IT IS VERY, VERY COOL."

Your lips twitch, and you feel yourself grinning. Thank god, he was just being a dork.

He looks satisfied at your reaction, and leads you into his room. It is, in fact, very cool. The room has the same pattern as the living room, along with a a huge carpet.

There's a car bed, with a pillow smack dab in the middle. There are books, action figures, and a computer. Near the door, there's a box with a few bones, most yellow tinted.

"DO YOU WANT ONE?" he asks, picking it up and giving it to you. It feels strange, but you decide to keep the strange bone. (Nevermind that he gave it without you even asking. It's weird how perceptive both brothers are.)

"WELL!! NOW THAT WE'RE HERE, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?" Papyrus ask, bobbing his head slightly. You shrug. Then, you get an almost embarrasing idea, and you hesitate.

You stutter a bit before falling silent.

Papyrus puts his hands on your shoulders, causing you to look at him. His eyes are kind and cheerful. Nonjudging. You take a deep breath in, before wrapping your hands around his chest. He kneels, so you both won't be in painful positions, and wraps his hands around your middle.

You bury your head against his chest. It's kinda embarrassing how much you like a monster's pulsing heartbeat, but Papyrus doesn't mind. If anything, he seems confused by your actions, petting your hair slightly. He doesn't realize that you're doing anything other than hugging until he hears you give a little content sigh.

Unknowingly to you, he and Sans held a conversation about this. He sends his magic to you, and you smile softly. Your grip slacks, and you nuzzle his chest. You would be mortified if your mind wasn't filled with 'I really need this'.

And Papyrus would be slightly worried at your trust if you didn't seem so happy. He kinda hoped this wasn't some kind of drug to humans, because that would turn out very, very badly.

Nevertheless, you continued to hug him until there was a knock on the door. Oh yeah, you left Sans out there to deal with Hell's Kitchen. Whoops.

You reluctantly pulled away, your whole body warm.

'Thank you' Papyrus tilts his head. "IS THAT ALL YOU REALLY WANTED? THAT WAS EASILY GIVABLE! SURELY THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE?" You shake your head, and point to the door. "OH RIGHT? I ALMOST FORGOT. THIS WAS A FUN HANGOUT!!" Papyrus says, slipping his hand into yours. You smile.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO!! A few things I wanted to address
> 
> 1) I complete missed the "in Snowin" part of this!! I worked all day, though, and I am completely unwilling to change it.
> 
> 2) Frisk needs some affection BADLY. They don't have the best parents.
> 
> 3) Everyone's very touchy here!! I have no idea why!!! Just,,,,warm hugs are great okay 
> 
> 4) I wanted to do an ending where they're all cuddling but. That's WAY to quick to do. AND THIS IS ALREADY HELLA QUICK LMAO
> 
> 5) This was a shitty attemp at Narrator! Chara
> 
> Requests are still open, so drop me a line on here or [my writing tumblr!](https://idontwannagetdunkedon.tumblr.com)


	6. Bad Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She's here, in her Lab, and she wants to die. Nothing usual about that, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warnings for self loathing, thoughts of self harm, and suicidal thoughts 
> 
>  
> 
> Alphys POV

It's not a good day.

She realizes this as she lays down and sighs into her claws. The anxiety twirling in her gut doesn't go away no matter how hard she breathes, no matter how much she wants to not care.

Nothing had really even happened!

But of course, to her hell brain, she fucked up! Good going Alphys! Now you can lie in your pit of self loathing and die all alone!! That's the life you deserve!

Well. She'd always been some sort of a fuck up. And she'd accepted that. But the overwhelming urge to cry when she thinks it always overtakes her, burning her eyes. She wants to tear out her scales and smash her computer, she wants dust to stick onto her knuckles as she curls up into a ball and cries. She wants to do a lot of things, but she hardly ever does.

She's tired.

She's tired, and that's why there's never dust. A fuckton of tears, sure, but she'd learned a long time ago that she was too scared to hurt herself.

She was a coward.

(And, maybe, she'd still wanted to believe there was still hope.)

There's also the part where the few people she knows would find out. And thinking that in itself is exhausting, since she can't even hide anything properly. They'd find out if she did it hurt herself, and maybe it'd be because she can't keep her stupid problems to herself.

Sure! Keep the important problems to yourself, and tell people your unimportant thoughts of suicide! How great, Alphys! You get a goddamn metal of honor.

Honestly, she wants everyone to know how shitty she is, so they can leave her. She wouldn't blame them.  But then....She realizes that they wouldn't actually miss her, right? They were putting up with her, for whatever reason. She can list the amount of people that might care.

On her fingers, at least.

But she's selfish, and doesn't want to be alone. And that's the funny part, since she's almost always alone and it's _ALWAYS_ her fault.

She feels tears threating to fall, but she doesn't let them. She tries to sink into the bed, or distract herself. It doesn't work, and it hardly ever does.

 _'I'm miserable'_ she thinks, and this time she stops. She really is miserable, huh. She deserves it, too.

The damn breaks.

She deserves this, she deserves to be sad and anxious, she deserves to cry and be in pain. She deserves to huddle up and hyperventilate until she can't breathe, and just keep going keep going keep going keep going. To just go and go and go and go until it leads her straight back to that damn waterfall. Yet she's still a baby about it. 

Stupid fucking Alphys. So she cries and cries and cries, even as her phone buzzes twice. She cries as she reaches for it, hiccuping and wiping snot from her nose. She keeps blubbering as she opens the message, since she has nothing better to do while she's still a mess.

She vaguely recognizes Undyne's picture, and that just causes another well of tears.

_hey!!_

_how you doing, hun?_

She doesn't even flutter at the nickname. (Undyne would never like an ugly shit like her. Not with how _stunning_ she was.)

She wipes her snot again, and her shirt is practically soaking by now. It only adds to the feelings of disgust.

She types out a message-

_fucking awful, I feel like throwing myself off that cliff lmao_

-and deletes it. She hesitates, wiping her tears before typing up -

_really shitty lol_

-and decides to delete it again. She types up something, again, because her anxiety isn't letting her function properly.

_I'm not doing that well, actually. I was crying a few minutes ago, because i'm kinda shit and i wanna die constantly. sorry_

She stares at the message for a long time. She deletes it. There's so many things she wants to type up. When she finally manages to respond, it's short. Simple.

_pretty good!! u?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> visit my tumblr (idontwannagetdunkedon.tumblr.com) for more Quality edge
> 
> this isn't intense but eh


End file.
